Tuesday, November 13, 2012

When Your Natural Hair is the Topic of Discussion at Thanksgiving

By Tenisha Mercer

It's almost Thanksgiving ... time to spend family time at the dinner table with family and friends who may or may not love our natural hair. 

As a natural, it really can be a challenging time, especially if your hair is the subject of conversation at the dinner table. Thanksgiving can really leave us feeling some sort of way. That time when all of your family is gathered around, just waiting to give you their opinion about your hair. As if you asked!

And don't let you have done something major to your hair, such as a big chop, TWA or wearing your hair natural for the first time.

Handling Natural Hair Commentary

How family acts depends on a lot of things (if they are receptive to natural hair, if they are anti-natural or a combination, and whether your family feels compelled to tell YOU how they think YOU should should wear YOUR hair).


I always find that if you turn the question back on folks, most back down. And I'm all about the snarky  -- not being rude, but getting your point across. They might be your elders, but they need to stay the hell out of your head!

And of course, turning the questions around to them and their (probably jacked up) hair practices always helps. That, and being positive about your curls always seems to deflate negative natural hair comments.

Don't let Grandma make you feel like your natural hair doesn't belong at the dinner table. But, recognize she may be from a different era  ... and now it's time to school her! But you know there are always some special cases that require special attention.

No matter what Big Momma and Aunt Edna have to say about yo' natural hair, here are a few good comebacks.

Aunt Edna: What did you do to all of that long, pretty hair?
You: It's still pretty, Aunt Edna. It's just shorter. Don't you just love it?

Aunt Edna: When are you going to perm your  hair? You really need it!
You: When you stop wearing your wig. I LOVE my Natural hair, that God gave me. I don't "need" a perm. I need my natural hair. Are you saying that God made a mistake with my hair?

Aunt Edna: I wish you would do something to your hair. It's so nappy! You used to have good hair!
You: I do something to my hair every day and my hair is nappy and happy. I love my naps. No one has hair just like me. Every coil and kink is different. There is no such thing as "good" hair. Good hair is healthy hair, and my hair is  healthy. But I see you have some thinning from relaxers. What are you going to do about it?

How do you think your natural hair will be perceived at Thanksgiving? What are your comeback?

No comments:

Post a Comment