Tuesday, September 29, 2015

Would you wear these?

Listen. I am from Detroit. And you know how we do when it comes to our gators. Now, I love gators just as much as anybody else from where it gets cold enough to literally freeze your tongue off in January -- you know, cities like Detroit, the Chi and Cleveland immediately come to mind; they're also known for their gator repertoire, too.

There are levels to this gator shit. I mean. Biggie did rap about 'stank pank' gators, right? And usually, that means pink cotton candy colored gators to match the pastel pink suit, mkay? I digress ... But this ... I draw the line at this foolishness.

I have worn snakeskin, eel and all kinds of reptiles (come for me, PETA, and trust you will get molly whopped with a mink-covered fist). But I will be damned if I wear a baby crocodile with waving legs with a sole and some shoe laces on my damn feet. 

I am so confused. Did they forget there was a dead alligator with teeth and a tail  ... on their foot? 

That gator life ain't for er'ybody. They don't set you back a mortgage payment -- or two -- for this nonsense. But y'all can have this foolishness right here. This is NOT Detroit gator approved. This is not what Biggie meant.

I. Can't!


  1. Lol. Thank you for reading and commenting.

  2. Lol. Thank you for reading and commenting.

  3. We are not wearing them boys in the D....someone will truly get their feelings hurt trying to step out in those.

  4. What? But why? Friends don't let friends wear THE WHOLE alligator. I blame the friends.