Is There Ever Such A Thing as Too Much Hair?

Largest afro according to Guiness, but how can she see?

For some naturals, the focus is all about length -- mid-back, waist length, butt and hip length hair.

But at what point is too much? At what point is too much length or hair a bad thing?

So many hair sites and forums "ooh" and "aah" the longer the natural hair. I sometimes wonder how well-known naturals with long hair icons like Cipriana and Sara manage with their hair. It's got to take hours to wash, detangle and style -- a routine that you have to do all over again in the next few weeks or so, depending upon your washing schedule. And these aren't heat trained naturals with flat ironed or press hair, naturals with twist outs, fros, braid outs and clouds of kinks that are probably prone to SSKs and tangles.

When Is it Too Much?

I think about all of that hair and I get tired just thinking about it. That's why some naturals swear off length like it's the plague. They want length, but manageable length that won't take all day to wash, comb, dry and style. So they forego super long hair for just long hair.

I get it. I've seen a few pictures on natual hair blogs of hair that totally overwhelms all facial features; all you see is hair. That's never been my M-O. For me, hair should compliment, not hide, your facial features. I never want to "hide" behind  my hair.


Yet, for others, length is the ultimate quest.

But if you're complaining about how long your wash day and regimen takes now at shoulder length, can you imagine how much it will take when your hair is waist length? Or, how much more products you'd use?

Would You Make the Sacrifice?

That's why some naturals skip length; it simply takes too much time. That's part of the reason why I cut my hair off in 2006. I'd had enough of hair, and doing my two young daughters' hair. So I cut mine all off. Like shaved off.

Today, my daughters are old enough to maintain their own hair. As of late last year, they've been getting their hair professional styled so I rarely touch it. Six years late, my hair has grown back -- and then some.

But I sometimes miss how easy it was to maintain my hair back then when it was just short curls -- not a lot of product, no fussing over deep conditioners, and not a lot of time spent detangling. True wash-and-go hair.

Short Hair As A Preference

Short hair, for most of us, is a choice -- a choice that I will probably make again some day. Everyone doesn't want, or need, long hair.

I tell myself that I'll keep growing my hair until I'm 40. Then I'll probably cut it all off and get a TWA. Besides, short hair makes most women look younger. At least, I think so. Instead of worrying about split ends, tangles and matting, I'll worry about a different type of maintenance regimen -- as in making sure I get regular cuts and trims to maintain my TWA. 

Maybe I'll keep it that way. At least for a while.

What do you think? Would you forego length? What is your maximum length?

HairSpiration: Esperanza Spalding

 

 



Esperanza without her fro at a recent CD promotion



 

Esperanza Spalding emerged onto the music scene a few years ago with her trademark fro -- and we've been in hair love ever since!

A Grammy nominated bassist, Spalding is known as much for her beautiful fluffy coils as for her music -- which she's played for the Obamas at the White House. She has flaunted a variety of natural hairstyles -- her mile-high fro at the Academy Awards, a chic updo at the Academy Awards last year, pinned back styles and dense, curly fros.

Now, I'm not one to tell people what styles they should wear with their own hair, but Spalding was recently sported wearing what looks like a wash-and-go. I like it, but I like her fro better! Since her big, fluffy cloud of curls is her trademark, I'm not used to seeing her without them.

This look is going to take some getting used to.

 



Esperanza with her fro at the Academy Awards



What do you think? Fro or no?












5 Ways To Color Block Your Wardrobe

Color Blocking

Color blocking is all the rage this season.

It's the next best thing since sliced bread. But there's a right way -- and a wrong way -- to do it, and color blocking takes a bit of color savvy to get it right. It's not automatic, but with these tips, we'll have you color blocking in no time.

1. Start with your favorite color as a base. Who said base colors have to be neutrals? I love deep pink shades -- fuchsia (or hot pink) and corals. I often start with those colors and work my way around, using those colors as neutrals.

2. Get out your color chart. Colors are a science. Not all of them go together and no, black and white don't go with every damn thing! Find out which colors naturally pair well together by hue -- orange and blue, purple and orange, green and blue, yellow and orange, yellow and green, blue and purple, and so on. If you are unsure, use your color chart as a guide.

3. Incorporate bursts of color. Nothing brightens up an outfit more than a burst of color. And, color blocking isn't a do-or-die thing: you don't have to have an ensemble, how about just an accessory? If you've got an orange dress, add a bright blue belt. Or throw on a mustard yellow cardi over that bright blue dress. Use color blocking this way if you are afraid to go all out. The look you are NOT going for is the matchy matchy. It's OK to use different shades of colors.

The turquoise blue belt is what makes Malinda Williams' outfit WERK!

4. Use a neutral as a base. If you are just unsure how to color block, you can always keep things a bit more subtle by using neutral colors like beige, khaki, tan, white and grey as neutrals. A bright orange top with a khaki bottom works. So, too, would a mustard yellow shirt with a gray bottom. Use your imagination. The sky is the limit.

5. Don't overdo it. While fun, color blocking should not be overdone. Your entire ensemble doesn't have to be color blocked. How about just a few accessories here and there? Or, if your outfit is color blocked, add a neutral shoe in a tan or beige as a way to balance the look out.

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Do you color block?

HairTroversy: How Do You Handle A Hair Compliment When Wearing A Weave/Wig?

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Sometimes, even the most well intentioned comment can go all the hell wrong.

I was at Rack Room shoes today when I saw what I thought was a headful of thick, natural hair. Mid-back length straight, thick hair, lots of body and thick curls at the end.

Before I could compliment her, she complimented me: "Your hair is so pretty!" I returned the compliment and said: "Actually, I was going to tell you, I like your hair."  She immediately pointed to her hair said, "Oh, thank you, I'm natural under here. It's hot and I had to do something with it. I couldn't take it anymore. "

My face was probably looking all kind of wrong, because I had no idea she had a weave. The ends of her hair were thick, like sponge roller thick type of curls. Most weaved up girls get the long, pin straight weaves. This young lady had thick, but straight hair. I just knew it was hers.

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When A Compliment Goes Horribly Wrong

Turns out it wasn't, and it left me feeling awkward as hell. I immediately felt like I might have made her a bit uncomfortable. If I could do it over again, I wished she would have said thank you and kept it moving. I didn't need an explanation about why she wore her hair the way she did; that's her business.

All of which left me thinking: Is there a right way and a wrong way to give a hair compliment?
Should the receiver of the compliment just say thank you and keep it moving or should they admit that it's not their hair?

I don't like to throw shade. If it's obvious that a person has a wig/weave and I like it, I just say, "Nice hair" and leave it at that. Now, sometimes the person will say, "thank you." Other times, they'll admit it's not theirs.

Hey, I'm cool with both. Personally, I've done both when I wore wigs, but especially the latter when I was new to wearing my La Jay wig. The more comfortable I got wearing it, "thank you" became the only explanation needed.

Do you admit you are wearing a wig/weave when you get a compliment? Do you make excuses for wearing a wig/weave?

HairSpiration: Pump Up The Volume



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I love her hair! So thick and lush. Itching to do a light blow out, so maybe I'll see if I can pull off this look.

Either way, it's a great summer style.

My hair is thick, but I don't know how I'll make it appear this dense or have this much volume?

CurlCrush

Love her curls!


What products, techniques or methods do you use for curl definition?

Can All Skin Types Pull Off Color?

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There's no doubt about it -- color is HUGE this spring, from retro bright neon colors to warm tangerines, brilliant blues and vivid yellows.

But after talking to a co-worker recently, as I wore a bright tangerine dress last week, I realized not everyone can  wear color if they have paler (some Caucasian) skin tones. This particular co-worker told me that she wishes that she could pull the look off, but felt that the color would wash out her pale skin.

I told her I wasn't so sure about that (maybe not a bright tangerine dress, but use color as an accent with things like scarves, belts, shoes, etc). Here's what I do know: NOTHING looks better on brown skin than color (I take that back, maybe a bright, crisp white).

We are fortunate enough that our brown skin is truly a canvas, and colors are our palettes. From the lightest of the light to the darkest of the dark, our rich undertones can pull off just bright colors with no problem. Usually, the darker the person, the more bolder color they can pull off.

Appreciating What We've Got
So often, there is a secret wishing and lament of how our bodies are different than Caucasians (our thick lips, full hips, beautiful backsides and kinky hair). I get it. When you grow up being the "minority" there are times that you just want to be like everyone else.

But since all I've ever been, and know how to be, is a Black woman, there's no need in me now wishing my natural hair was straighter, my chocolate skin was lighter, my African body type waifier, my ass was smaller, or my big nose was pointier.

As I tell my daughters, we have naturally what other races pay thousands for, for free -- melanin-kissed skin that doesn't wrinkle as easily, pigemented skin where tanning is an option, not a requirement, backsides that Kim Kardashian had to pay for, thick lips that don't need any collagen and hair that doesn't need weave to make it appear fuller.

Do You Accept Yourself?
It's called self acceptance. Certain aspects of your personality? You can change that. But unless you go under the knife and get major plastic surgery, certain body parts aren't going to change drastically, even with weight loss. And after nearly 40 years of being a Black woman, it's a message that we all need reminding of -- to like and work with what we've got, because no wishing in the world will make us something else.

This is what my older self wishes I could have told my younger self: Oh, how I wish that I felt this way when I was about 13, when I remember telling my grandmother that I was too "dark" to wear bright clothing. Sad to admit it even now, but maybe it was the many times that I was teased on the playground for my complexion that explains why I internalized that and felt that way then.

That's part of the reason why I especially gravitate to bright colors now because of my earlier rejection of them -- that, and because they look good on me! It's also why I'm particularly glad that we've come to accept our natural hair. It's a small start, but at least it's a start.

Do you struggle with self acceptance? What does your older, wiser self wish you'd have told your younger self? Do you think all skin types can pull off color?