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Sometimes, even the most well intentioned comment can go all the hell wrong.
I was at Rack Room shoes today when I saw what I thought was a headful of thick, natural hair. Mid-back length straight, thick hair, lots of body and thick curls at the end.
Before I could compliment her, she complimented me: "Your hair is so pretty!" I returned the compliment and said: "Actually, I was going to tell you, I like your hair." She immediately pointed to her hair said, "Oh, thank you, I'm natural under here. It's hot and I had to do something with it. I couldn't take it anymore. "
My face was probably looking all kind of wrong, because I had no idea she had a weave. The ends of her hair were thick, like sponge roller thick type of curls. Most weaved up girls get the long, pin straight weaves. This young lady had thick, but straight hair. I just knew it was hers.
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Turns out it wasn't, and it left me feeling awkward as hell. I immediately felt like I might have made her a bit uncomfortable. If I could do it over again, I wished she would have said thank you and kept it moving. I didn't need an explanation about why she wore her hair the way she did; that's her business.
All of which left me thinking: Is there a right way and a wrong way to give a hair compliment?
Should the receiver of the compliment just say thank you and keep it moving or should they admit that it's not their hair?
I don't like to throw shade. If it's obvious that a person has a wig/weave and I like it, I just say, "Nice hair" and leave it at that. Now, sometimes the person will say, "thank you." Other times, they'll admit it's not theirs.
Hey, I'm cool with both. Personally, I've done both when I wore wigs, but especially the latter when I was new to wearing my La Jay wig. The more comfortable I got wearing it, "thank you" became the only explanation needed.
Do you admit you are wearing a wig/weave when you get a compliment? Do you make excuses for wearing a wig/weave?
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